OnlyKnives has come out with two Presidential Multi-tools — The “Maverick” and the “Change”:
The McCain Maverick features:
- An electric drill, so you can “drill baby drill”
- A clothes hanger, to anger pro-life and pro-choice voters alike
- A Geiger counter
- A pry bar, to get rid of that pesky Bush legacy
- An abacus, to help balance the budget
- A defibrillator, to keep that heart going
- And lipstick, suitable for various barnyard animals
The Obama Change features:
- A celebrity love meter that displays Obama’s Q score
- Super glue, to keep the Democratic Party together (formulated especially for former Clinton supporters)
- A muzzle, for loudmouths and former pastors
- A spatula for flipping waffles
- An elephant prod, suitable for disgruntled Republican Congresscritters
- A money clip, for all those campaign contributions
