[Jokes from June 28, 2016]
“Donald Trump appears to be softening some of his anti-immigration views lately. So it sounds to me like someone’s shopping for a new wife.” – Conan O’Brien
“Today, Democrats said the committee investigating Hillary Clinton’s involvement with Benghazi was a ‘witch hunt.’ Hillary tried to respond, but just then a house fell on her.” – Conan O’Brien
“Just yesterday, Rio’s acting governor warned the Olympics could be a ‘big failure’, which is actually an improvement, because until yesterday, it looked like a massive catastrophe.” – Stephen Colbert
“Corruption and crime aren’t the only things plaguing the Olympics. There’s also actual plague, because fear over the Zika virus, which can cause birth defects, has led some athletes to stay home and others to take special precautions, like freezing their sperm. ‘What’s going on in there?’ ‘Don’t open the door. I’m training for the Olympics!'” – Stephen Colbert
Also published on Medium.