Tuesday, October 16, 2012
“The vice-presidential debate is tomorrow night. Democrats took a pounding at the last debate, so now they’re going to be a little more aggressive. Joe Biden is thinking of opening with a head butt.” – David Letterman “You know Obama’s campaign is in trouble when they’re looking to Joe Biden to turn things around.” – […]
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“Apparently after last week’s debate, polls show Obama trailing Romney by one point. One point — or as it’s also known, ‘the thing Obama failed to make during last week’s debate.’” – Jimmy Fallon “Democrats are accusing Mitt Romney of cheating during the debate. I don’t know who he cheated off of, but I think […]
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“During Wednesday’s debate Mitt Romney said that even though he likes Big Bird, if elected he would stop the subsidy to PBS – it’s a surprising threat considering that ‘Mitt’ is such an excellent Muppet name.” – Seth Meyers “Romney went on to say if elected he would no longer borrow money from China to […]
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Saturday, October 13, 2012
John Oliver sees a bright side to all the election spending, and wants more:
“New job numbers came out today. Unemployment went way down from 8 percent to 7.8 percent. Of course, a lot of this was because of the ever-expanding industry of Mitt Romney fact checkers.” – Bill Maher “You got to hand it to Mitt Romney. He was in full command of his bullshit. In one single […]
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Wednesday, October 10, 2012
“After months of buildup, last night was the first presidential debate at the University of Denver. Of course, a lot of big names didn’t show up to the event — Joe Biden, Nancy Pelosi, President Obama.” – Jimmy Fallon “It’s like Obama wasn’t even there. He hasn’t done this poorly since he debated Clint Eastwood.” […]
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© Tom Tomorrow Revenge of the Penguin Plutocrat? The Empire Strikes Back? Stay tuned for the Return of the Jedi.
“Tonight is the first presidential debate of 2012. Tonight was also one of the only nights of the year when you might actually hear someone say, ‘Honey, turn on C-SPAN’.” – Jimmy Kimmel “The presidential debates were earlier tonight, and I think most of the nation’s all thinking the same thing – just one more […]
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Maureen Dowd has a hilarious column pretending to be post-mortem debate practice for Obama on what he should have said in the first round. The whole column is worth reading, but here’s an excerpt: Opponent: I want to take that $716 billion you’ve cut and put it back into Medicare. Obama: The $716 billion I’ve […]
© Lalo Alcaraz Mitt Romney makes a meal of Big Bird. So much for creating jobs! Luckily, some Sesame Street characters become productive contributors to the economy. © Nick Anderson
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“For tomorrow’s debate, President Obama’s advisers have been working with him to keep his responses short. In fact, the only words the president plans on saying are ‘bin Laden’ and ‘dead.’ That’s it.” – Conan O’Brien “I understand they are going to have ‘fact checkers’ standing by — just in case either candidate happens to […]
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Steve Martin has created one of the most eccentric political endorsements ever:
Saturday, October 6, 2012
“The presidential debate is on Wednesday. Mitt Romney has been preparing for the debate by debating a Republican senator who plays the part of President Obama. Meanwhile, President Obama has been preparing for Romney by debating an ATM machine.” – Conan O’Brien “The math behind how Romney can give everyone a 20% tax cut without […]
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“There are 40 days left until the election. A lot can happen in 40 days — Obama can make a gaffe, Mitt could win the debates, God can send a flood to destroy all mankind. So, there’s hope.” – Stephen Colbert “The presidential debates begin on Wednesday. Romney has taken two days off to prepare. […]
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