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Late Night Political Humor

“Fox News host Bill O’Reilly is writing a new book about the killing of Jesus. It will be the first time Jesus’ death is blamed on Obamacare.” – Conan O’Brien

“After the success of his book, ‘Killing Lincoln,’ Bill O’Reilly is coming out with a new book called ‘Killing Jesus.’ He’s going to be disappointed when he finds out there’s already a book about that.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Today 15 Republican Senators demanded the withdrawal of Hagel’s nomination and it’s no wonder. Senate Republicans have found all sorts of shady associations in Hagel’s past. For instance, he was once a Senate Republican.” – Stephen Colbert

“The fact that these organizations don’t exist only makes it more suspicious that Chuck Hagel has been tied to them … President Obama, withdraw Hagel’s nomination, or you will lose the support of moderate Republicans — another group that doesn’t exist.” – Stephen Colbert

“It was just announced that President Obama will speak at Ohio State’s graduation in May. The president has a lot in common with those students. He’s currently in his fifth year and swamped with debt.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Someone hacked into Donald Trump’s Twitter account. It’s filled with offensive nonsense and stupid jokes. Then it got hacked.” – Craig Ferguson

“The U.S. Postal Service is launching a fashion line. Some people think it is a bad idea. But I think if the post office gets behind something, it’ll eventually turn out to be a good idea. Just look at sponsoring Lance Armstrong.” – Craig Ferguson

“Officials in Pakistan are complaining that the movie ‘Zero Dark Thirty’ contains a lot of errors. They were like, ‘The movie makes Pakistan out to be a hellish wasteland of corruption and intolerance – but in real life, it’s WAY worse than that.'” – Jimmy Fallon


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    Tuesday, April 9, 2013 at 9:50 pm | Permalink