“A new website just came out that’s designed to calculate how long it takes Mitt Romney to earn your salary. So from now on, whenever Mitt Romney is running late, he can call there and say, ‘I’ll be there in five teachers.’” – Conan O’Brien “What’s interesting is in the time it took you to […]
“President Obama gave his annual State of the Union address. And the State of the Union for 2012 is Kentucky. Congratulations.” – Jimmy Kimmel “There’s a State of the Union drinking game. Let me just say this, if you really are playing the State of the Union drinking game, you’re probably an alcoholic.” – Jimmy […]
[reprinted from Margaret and Helen. I don’t mean to pick on Newt, but this was just too much fun. Helen writes:] The Passion of the Newt Margaret, let me see if I get this right. The political party that brought us Family Values now gives us Newt Gingrich? South Carolina likes to say that they […]
“Newt Gingrich crushed Mitt Romney on Saturday (in South Carolina). … Gingrich sealed his victory in last week’s debates by going after America’s most dangerous enemy: debate moderators.” – Stephen Colbert “‘Newt triumphed with 40% of the vote to Mitt Romney’s 28% — a gap so wide, you could fit Newt’s head in it.” – […]
© Jim Morin In the last quarter of 2011, the economy grew at an annual rate of 2.8% (up from 1.8% in the prior quarter), and much of this growth was fueled by growth in the sales of automobiles and other durable goods. Over 3 million private-sector jobs have been created in the last 22 […]
“Rick Perry dropped out. He said while it’s sad he won’t be president, he can always run again next year.” – Bill Maher “Actually, Rick Perry pulled out of the presidential race yesterday – which is bad news for the guys on death row in Texas. He’s coming home and he’s not in a good […]
“Rick Perry dropped out of the presidential race. When asked what went wrong, Perry said, I guess America is not ready to elect a dumb guy from Texas. But in time.” – Conan O’Brien “Rick Perry has dropped out of the presidential race. Apparently, America did not want a conservative, gun happy, intellectually challenged governor […]
“Mitt Romney is coming under fire because even though he is a multimillionaire, he only paid 15 percent in taxes. That’s not a tax, that’s barely a tip.” – Jay Leno “Mitt Romney is quite a guy. At one point he and his wife bought a zoo and fired all the animals.” – David Letterman […]
“Mitt Romney, whose father was born in Mexico, is now talking up his Mexican heritage. Not to be outdone today, Newt Gingrich said he once cheated on one of his wives with a woman named Juanita.” – Jay Leno “And so it was that on Martin Luther King Day, Newt Gingrich shared his vision of […]
“When Mitt Romney heard a story about people getting pissed on, he launched into his defense of venture capitalism.” – Bill Maher (regarding the video of American soldiers urinating on Afghan bodies) “During a campaign event on Saturday, Mitt Romney reached into his pocket and gave cash to a woman who said she was broke. […]
Now it’s the Obama Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. This is pretty silly, but who can resist:
© Drew Sheneman I can’t blame politicians and corporations for having the desire to control the internet. If they succeed in sneaking these laws past us, we have only ourselves to blame. Interestingly enough, it seems like support for SOPA and PIPA — at least prior to Wednesday — was one of the few things […]
“President Obama met with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie in the Oval Office yesterday. And after they left, Obama checked the White House to make sure Sasha and Malia were still there.” – Jimmy Fallon “Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt visited the White House. There was an odd moment when they tried to adopt President […]
“Congratulations to Mitt Romney. He won the New Hampshire primary last night. See, this is proof that even the multi-millionaire son of a multi-millionaire can beat the odds and run for president of the United States.” – Jay Leno “The thing I don’t like about Romney is that he’s not funny. For a while, the […]
Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert continue to not coordinate the activities of their super PAC. And make fun of our totally bizarre and corrupt election laws: The Christian Science Monitor says it is all completely legal. In addition, Colbert’s super PAC is running a new ad in South Carolina, encouraging voters to vote for Herman […]
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