“Last night, President Barack Obama spoke from the Oval Office about his plan to clean up the oil spill. Did you folks get a chance to see it? Yeah. Well, I’m glad that problem’s behind us.” – David Letterman “Last night, President Obama delivered a prime time address on the oil spill. He said his […]
© Tom Toles I’m sure most patriotic right-wing Americans don’t even know what a Vuvuzela is, since they would never be caught dead watching anything but American Football. But if they use their trunks instead, that will be even better, since it will grow every time they say something!
[This is another story from Fred Wickham that I’m reposting. See his site for more.] On January 20th, 2008, a truckload of Whup-Ass was delivered to the White House. The pallets sat unbroken for nearly eighteen months until today, when President Obama had Rahm Emmanuel bring a box into the oval office. “How do we […]
“President Obama was in the gulf region again today, having lunch at a local seafood restaurant. Horrible timing. A clam coughed up a tarball.” – David Letterman “President Obama also ordered a lemon-lime snow cone on the beach. A little awkward. Obama was like, ‘Forget the oil spill for a minute. Can we figure out […]
“How about that oil slick in the Gulf of Mexico. And you know, the oil slick is going everywhere. So the next time somebody lands on the Hudson, it won’t be that big a deal.” – David Letterman “The White House said today that BP is moving up its timeline for containing the oil by […]
“There is good news! BP today finally managed to almost completely stop the flow of information.” – Bill Maher “Thanks to BP, the Gulf now has two new islands: self-service and full.” – David Letterman “There is good news. Scientists sent a probe down there in the Gulf of Mexico today and they found traces […]
It’s about time he had a nervous breakdown. Brought to you by the League of Indecency.
“Yesterday, British Petroleum stock dropped $17 billion in value. And the executives at British Petroleum say they have no idea what happened. I kind of have an idea. I kind of think maybe I got a hunch.” – David Letterman “According to a new report, BP has the worst safety record of all the oil […]
© Mike Luckovich What will it take to break our unhealthy dependence on oil?
“A few days ago, Vice President Biden and Rahm Emanuel had a water gun fight during a party at Biden’s house. Meanwhile, Sasha and Malia spent the last few days trying to solve the BP oil crisis.” – Jimmy Fallon “BP is now saying they’ve captured anywhere from 35 percent to 75 percent of the […]
© Joe Heller Those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it.
© Ed Stein Building on their earlier decision that money is speech and corporations are people (actually giving corporations more free speech rights than real people), the Supreme Court has now blocked a provision of the Arizona campaign financing system that provided matching funds to candidates who agreed to not accept large private donations. Or […]
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