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Category Archives: Humor

Late Night Political Humor

“People are being really picky about the upcoming election. I read that Americans do not want the next president to be a first-term senator, be over 65, or have a former president in the family. Then the Secret Service said, ‘Hey, whoever slips through slips through. No promises.’” – Jimmy Fallon “A new poll finds […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“Hillary Clinton made a campaign stop in Las Vegas yesterday. She said she wants citizenship for undocumented immigrants. But after seeing Americans celebrate Cinco de Mayo yesterday, immigrants said, ‘You know what, we’re good. We’re gonna head back now. We’ve had enough.’” – Jimmy Fallon “Today Secretary of State John Kerry visited the small African […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen attended a fundraiser for Hillary Clinton in New York City this week. Hillary told them, ‘Good luck with the reboot of your ’90s show.’ And they said, ‘Thanks. Good luck with yours.’” – Jimmy Fallon “Our guest tonight is Michelle Obama, first lady of the United States. She’s here to announce […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders is expected to announce tomorrow that he is running for president, making him Hillary Clinton’s only Democratic challenger so far. Or as Hillary put it, ‘Oooo, appetizers!’” – Jimmy Fallon “Hillary Clinton gave a speech at Columbia University this afternoon. She ended it the way Clintons always end their speeches, by […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“Hillary Clinton wrote an op-ed for a paper in Iowa about her plans to help the middle class. Middle-class Americans said, ‘Why didn’t you just say that in a speech?’ and she said, ‘Because I charge $200,000 for a speech.’” – Jimmy Fallon “Hillary Clinton has temporarily changed her campaign logo to rainbow colors in […]

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Straining Credulity

[from satirist Andy Borowitz] Scientists: Earth Endangered by New Strain of Fact-Resistant Humans Scientists have discovered a powerful new strain of fact-resistant humans who are threatening the ability of Earth to sustain life, a sobering new study reports. The research, conducted by the University of Minnesota, identifies a virulent strain of humans who are virtually […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“In a two-hour interview last Friday, Bruce Jenner told ABC’s Diane Sawyer, ‘For all intents and purposes, I’m a woman.’ At which point, Joe Biden ran in and started giving Bruce a shoulder rub.” – Jimmy Fallon “The big story is Bruce Jenner. In last week’s interview, Jenner said he’s a woman who is transitioning […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“At the White House yesterday, a little girl actually asked first lady Michelle Obama how old she is. Michelle answered, ‘Old enough to put you on the No Fly List, sweetheart.’” – Jimmy Fallon “At the White House, they caught another fence jumper earlier today. It was Obama trying to get out.” – David Letterman […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“Today is Earth Day. Environmentalists spent the day drawing attention to the Earth, while the Earth just spent the day checking Facebook to see which planets wished it a happy Earth Day.” – Jimmy Fallon “Today is Earth Day. So this year I’m finally gonna do it. I’m gonna find out what the blue trash […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“Tomorrow President Obama will host NASCAR racing champion Kevin Harvick at the White House. They both said they look forward to spending an hour or two not having the slightest interest in what the other is saying.” – Jimmy Fallon “They arrested another fence jumper at the White House last night. Why are so many […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“Hillary Clinton is campaigning in Iowa, virtually going door to door to every home in Iowa. Jehovah’s Witnesses finally got fed up and said, ‘Get lost. Get out of here!’” – David Letterman “Hillary went to a Chipotle in a tortilla pantsuit.” – David Letterman “Hillary is in Iowa to listen to what the people […]

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Late Night Presidential Political Humor

On his plans for his remaining time in office: “After the midterm elections, my advisers asked me, ‘Mr. President, do you have a bucket list?’ And I said, ‘Well, I have something that rhymes with bucket list.’ Take executive action on immigration — bucket. New climate regulations — bucket. It’s the right thing to do.” […]

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Late Night Political Humor

“Hillary Clinton is now in Iowa. She’s spending every waking minute of her day meeting ordinary people, and it’s to prepare her for a job in which she will never again meet an ordinary person.” – David Letterman “Hillary Clinton is trying an entirely different approach with Iowa than the one she tried eight years […]

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Prejudice?

Just where in the Bible does it tell you to hate people? This message brought to you by Betty Bowers, America’s Best Christian!

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Late Night Political Humor

“Hillary Clinton announced she’s running for president. Yesterday in Ohio, Hillary popped into a Chipotle and she ordered a burrito bowl with chips and salsa. And on her way out she said, ‘That locks down the Hispanic vote.’” – Conan O’Brien “Hillary Clinton is running for president. This time around, she promises to be warm […]

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