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Late Night Political Humor

“In an interview with Playboy magazine, Dick Cheney criticized President Obama and said he’s quote, ‘the worst president of my lifetime, without question.’ Then Cheney said, ‘But enough talk. When do I take my clothes off?'” – Jimmy Fallon

“During an interview with Playboy — that’s right, Playboy — Dick Cheney said President Obama is the worst president in his lifetime. Meanwhile, subscribers to Playboy said Cheney was the worst centerfold in their lifetime.” – Conan O’Brien

“Dick Cheney said in a Playboy interview this week that Barack Obama is the worst president of his lifetime. Come on, you can’t tell me Obama is worse than Martin Van Buren.” – Seth Meyers

“Everyone’s busy filling out their March Madness brackets. Even Jeb Bush filled one out. And you can tell he’s running for president because his picks for the Final Four are Iowa, Iowa, Iowa, and Iowa.” – Jimmy Fallon

“President Obama filled out his March Madness bracket. You can tell Obama’s mind is elsewhere because his top two picks were Israel and Iran.” – Conan O’Brien

“President Obama recently sat down with ESPN and said the NCAA should reduce the shot clock for basketball games. Then he said, ‘And while we’re at it, is there any way they can reduce the ‘being president clock’?” – Jimmy Fallon

“President Obama has decided that he wants his presidential library to be in Chicago, not Hawaii. Today Hawaii’s governor said, ‘Great, who’s going to want to come to Hawaii now?'” – Conan O’Brien

“Mitt Romney, two-time Republican presidential candidate, is going to fight Evander Holyfield for charity. I hope they save some of that money for funeral expenses.” – David Letterman

“Everybody was upset that Vladimir Putin was missing. He was in Switzerland with his girlfriend. She had a baby in Switzerland because in Russia childbirth is not covered by Putin-care.” – David Letterman

“Arnold Schwarzenegger was stopped by police in Australia this week for riding a bike without a helmet. It’s especially dangerous for Schwarzenegger because if he got a concussion, how would you know?” – Seth Meyers


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