Skip to content

Unconditional Love

Jon Stewart on the repeal of DADT:

Share

The Octangulator


© Jen Sorensen

Sorensen has some interesting commentary to go with this comic about Obama’s seeming hyper-cautiousness. From the NY Times:

A Democratic Congressional adviser, granted anonymity to discuss party deliberations, said: “We’re at a loss to figure out a way to articulate the argument [for economic stimulus] in a way that doesn’t get us pegged as tax-and-spenders.”

Sorensen’s response:

Democrats could balance budgets until the end of time and still get tagged as tax-and-spenders. So this strategist’s solution is to stand like an unblinking cow in the middle of the train tracks and do nothing? For this, he or she actually gets paid?

Share

Cliff Notes


© Tom Tomorrow

Never negotiate with a crazy person.

Share

Suffer the Children

Child poverty is a leading predictor of how our country is going to do in the future. Children (especially very young children) who experience poverty have more difficulty learning and are much less successful as adults. They are less likely to graduate from high school, more likely to become very young parents, and will earn less money.

So it is bad news to learn that child poverty in this country has increased in 38 states. Nearly 15 million children live in poverty in the US. And another 31 million live in families where the loss of just two paychecks would produce economic catastrophe. Together, a stunning 43% of our nation’s children live in households that are economically insecure.

Would it really take much to turn us into a third-world country?

Share

So Very Sorry!

Congressman John Fleming (R-LA) appeared on MSNBC to talk about Obama’s new deficit reduction plan. Or rather, to argue against Obama’s plan to make the rich pay as much in taxes as the middle class do (Fleming is a multi-millionaire business owner). Fleming actually complained that after paying expenses and feeding his family “I have maybe $400,000 left over”.

He repeated several times the Republican talking point that it is the rich who create jobs, and that “class warfare has never created a job”. But when asked if he would have to lay off any of his employees if his taxes were raised, he changed the subject.

Oh, and in a separate interview with the Wall Street Journal, Fleming said that “he spends very little time on day-to-day management” of his businesses, which I guess is what leaves him the time to also pull in a salary as a US Representative.

Some people really need to get over themselves.

Share

Late Night Political Humor

“Some Tea Party members at the Republican debate cheered the idea of a sick uninsured person being left to die. In fairness, the person in question was one of the moms from ‘Toddlers & Tiaras.'” – Conan O’Brien

“During the Tea Party debate, Jon Huntsman said that America’s dependency on foreign oil is like being addicted to heroin. Then it got a little weird when he was like, ‘Trust me.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“The Republican debate set looked like the inside of Betsy Ross’s vagina. Or so I’ve been told. Anyway, I believe there was a point to this Amerigasm, and that was for seven candidates to give a beatdown to Rick Perry.” – Jon Stewart

“There was another Republican debate on CNN. The big winner: Monday night football on ESPN.” – Jay Leno

“The White House is planning an official state trip to Australia this November. Which explains why Biden spent all day looking for an Australian translator.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Threatening messages were posted on the White House Facebook page. Secret Service takes this very seriously and they’re warning that whoever is responsible runs the risk of being unfriended.” – Jay Leno

“President Obama wants to get Americans back to what we do best. He wants teachers teaching, police policing, firemen fighting fires, and the rest of us checking Facebook.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Obama says the jobs bill will be paid for. I don’t like this focus on paying for things. That’s what future generations are for.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“A new report says there has been a sharp increase in the use of marijuana over the last year. Maybe that explains the sharp increase in unemployment over the last year.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Anderson Cooper is on CNN, “60 Minutes” and now daytime TV. He’s like a male Ryan Seacrest. Anderson’s a serious journalist. He’s been to places torn apart by strife, like Bosnia and ‘The View.'” – Craig Ferguson

“People are saying that Anderson Cooper could be the new Oprah. And then these people are struck by lightning.” – Craig Ferguson

“Anderson Cooper was on the Johnny Carson ‘Tonight Show’ when he was 3 years old. And then he was bumped by a 2-year-old Jay Leno. That was back when Jay Leno was nothing but diapers and a chin. Just like now.” – Craig Ferguson

“My guest tonight is Al Gore, unless the Supreme Court decides it should be someone else.” – Stephen Colbert

“The U.S. Census Bureau reports that American homes are 650 square feet larger today than they were in 1980. Unfortunately, so are most Americans.” – Conan O’Brien

Share

Subsidies for the Energy Industry


© Ruben Bolling

Conservatives somehow think that loan guarantees for green energy is a bad idea, while directly subsidizing oil companies makes good sense.

Share

Green Light

Yesterday, I posted a video from the Daily Show talking about the Solyndra “scandal”, but it is not at all clear that it is really a scandal at all as most of the scandalous aspects of the situation are actually lies.

For example, conservative media repeatedly claims that “a major Solyndra investor is also a big Obama donor” in order to make it look like corruption, but this is simply not true. The donor in question released a statement saying “George Kaiser is not an investor in Solyndra and did not participate in any discussions with the U.S. government regarding the loan.”

Indeed, this loan actually originated under the Bush administration, so the idea that it was done to help an Obama campaign donor is silly.

Conservative media is also claiming that investment in green energy is a bad idea, but they ignore the fact that the main reason Solyndra went bankrupt was because its US-based manufacturing plant could not compete against solar panels manufactured in countries that are heavily subsidizing their green energy companies. In the last year, China alone gave $30 billion to six solar companies. Are conservatives saying that the US cannot compete anymore and we should just throw in the towel and give this new market to China?

I can’t think of a single market that is more important to our national security than energy. High energy prices have had a devastating impact on our economy, and our dependence on fossil fuels pollutes our environment and has ignited wars that cost of trillions of dollars. Replacing this with green energy is absolutely critical to our future.

The conservatives say that funding green energy should be left to private investors, but in the past our country did not blink at investing trillions of dollars in building a national highway system that private investors would never have funded. Isn’t ending our dependence on foreign oil at least as important as good roads?

One company going bankrupt does in no way indicate that investment in green energy is a bad idea. After all, our country funds lots of cancer research, and (by definition) some directions of research will not succeed. If our first attempt to cure cancer does not succeed, does that mean that fighting cancer is a bad idea? Of course not.

And finally, the idea that the loan guarantees to Solyndra are a complete loss because the company went bankrupt is ridiculous. Those guarantees allowed Solyndra to raise money, and that money was in turn invested in building a green energy manufacturing plant, develop a supply chain, and buy equipment from other companies. All of that money went back into the economy and will help future green energy investment. Solyndra itself will be sold, resulting in technology, research, equipment, and facilities that will be used by other companies.

Investment is inherently risky and that risk involves failure. If we really believe in the future of our country then we can not be afraid of risk, otherwise we doom ourselves to the certain failure of not even trying.


© John Cole

Share

Late Night Political Humor

“President Obama described himself as an eternal optimist. He then explained that he’s the kind of person that sees the country as ‘half employed.'” – Conan O’Brien

“According to a new poll, only 55 percent of Americans think President Obama is intelligent. Yeah, that may not sound impressive, but it’s up 55 percent over the last president.” – Jimmy Fallon

“In Michigan a man in a President Obama mask robbed a bank. Either that of President Obama has an exciting new plan to reduce the deficit.” –Conan O’Brien

‎”You know what I love most about that speech to the Congressional joint session? The awesome cutaways to uncomfortable Republicans.” – Jon Stewart

“Mitt Romney said that President Obama does not understand that the president doesn’t create jobs. Then Romney went on to explain his plan to create jobs once he’s elected president.” – Jay Leno

“Tim Pawlenty endorsed Mitt Romney, calling him a ‘bedrock conservative.’ When he heard this, John McCain said, ‘I grew up in Bedrock, and I don’t remember seeing him.'” – Conan O’Brien

“Since Rick Perry has been governor of Texas, 234 criminals have been executed. That’s the difference between Texas and California: In California, those criminals would have been given tryouts for the Raiders.” – Jay Leno

“It’s being reported that Rick Perry met his wife when they were in elementary school. There was another boy that liked her too but Perry had him executed.” – Conan O’Brien

“The economy is so bad that in Texas Rick Perry had to execute convicts just by throwing a toaster in the bath tub! That’s how bad.” – Jay Leno

“The Republican debate was up against Monday night football. It was like NFL vs. LOL.” – Jay Leno

“If the Tea Party cared about us they wouldn’t have scheduled their debate against the opening night of football, especially the Patriots. That’s something Kenyans would do.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“The moderators were Wolf Blitzer and Larry the Cable Guy. Rick Santorum won the swimsuit competition. Michele Bachmann won Miss Crazyality.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“His New York district is having a special election to replace Anthony Wiener. I was going to make a joke, but it’s just so hard at this point …” – Jimmy Fallon

“In England a dominatrix is saying a prominent politician used to hire her for services. Of course, a dominatrix in England is someone who ties you down and then flosses you.” – Conan O’Brien

“There’s a commemorative 9/11 Merlot, perfect for when you’re drinking to never forget. ” – Stephen Colbert

“A new study found that in the last 30 years, the average home size has increased by 600 square feet. Which is fitting, since in the last 30 years, the average person size has increased by 600 square feet.” – Jimmy Fallon

Share

Turning a Little Green

The problem with funding green energy seems to be that, unlike wars in Iraq — where billions of dollars went missing and even money that was accounted for often went into the coffers of companies that made major campaign contributions to Dubya — you can’t just dismiss those stories as unpatriotic or hide behind the label of being a “war president”.

Regardless, Solyndra is a big booboo for Obama.

Share

Late Night Political Irony

“Did you see all the Republican candidates lined up at the Reagan Library the other night? Didn’t they look like it was part of Disney’s ‘Hall of Never-Will-Be-Presidents.'” – Jay Leno

“The biggest applause line of the night was the mere mention that Rick Perry had executed 234 people. Holy fuckballs.” – Jon Stewart

“Michele Bachmann said she would do away with the Department of Education if elected president. In fact, if there’s no Department of Education, it would make it easier for her to be elected.” – Jay Leno

“Bachmann’s campaign manager stepped down, her deputy campaign manager left, and God hasn’t called her in weeks.” – Jay Leno

“Michele Bachmann is for people who find Sarah Palin too intellectual. She is pure. She is always completely fact-free. She said the Founding Fathers worked tirelessly until they got rid of slavery. So from now on Thomas Jefferson’s slaves will be known as friends with benefits.” – Bill Maher (appearing on Jay Leno)

“The virus in the movie ‘Contagion’ is based on the bird flu which came out of nowhere back in 2008. Everyone thought it was going to change the way we live and it just faded away. Wait a minute, I’m talking about President Obama.” – Craig Ferguson

“Cuban leader Fidel Castro made a rare TV appearance yesterday. He said everyone keeps reporting that he’s dead, but he’s actually alive and well. He said he went on TV, basically to prove he’s still alive. It’s pretty much the same reason President Obama was on TV last night. ‘I’m still here! I’ve got your jobs!'” – Jay Leno

“President Obama introduced his $447 billion jobs plan. A lot of economists say it could work — if we had $447 billion.” – Jay Leno

“House Speaker John Boehner said that President Obama’s jobs plan merits consideration. Then he was like, ‘In fact, I’ll do it right now. OK, I hate it.'” – Jimmy Fallon

“In his speech President Obama called the plan the ‘American Jobs Act.’ It sounds a lot better than the original title, the ‘Save My Ass Act.'” – Jay Leno

“The World Economic Forum, which ranks economies, moved the United States down to 5th place. But we’re still the fattest, so that’s good.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“President Obama said ‘No single individual built America on their own.’ When she heard that, Sarah Palin was like, ‘Hello? Paul Bunyan?'” – Jimmy Fallon

“Ricki Lake injured her shin while practicing for “Dancing with the Stars.” It was pretty serious. She was hobbling around the dance floor like Bristol Palin.” – Jay Leno

Share

The Daily Show Debates the Debate

Share

Tempest in a Teapot


© Lee Judge

I guess one way to prove that government can’t do anything right is to destroy the things it does well: Social Security, Medicare, the Post Office, etc. And make Congress even more dysfunctional at the same time.

Share

Late Night Political Humor

“The candidates at the Republican debate looked like a town council that was outlawing dancing.” – David Letterman

“They looked like a board of directors that was lying about poisoning a river.” – David Letterman

“Last night at the Republican debate MSNBC put little factoids about the candidates on the screen as they were speaking. For instance, Michele Bachmann: Pet peeve: facts. Gives Jesus the creeps. Has never seen her husband naked. Governor Rick Perry: Dumber than Bush, no lie. Motto: ‘Don’t mess with Texes.’ In high school voted ‘Most likely to execute 200+ people.’ Newt Gingrich: Even fatter in real life. Carpet matches the drapes. Favorite color: Donuts.” – Conan O’Brien

“Fun fact about Mitt Romney: He would appoint his hair ‘Secretary of Handsome.'” – Conan O’Brien

“Rick Perry said he understands healthcare because his wife is a nurse. He also says he understands terrorism because he watched all the seasons of ’24’.” –Conan O’Brien

“Perry used to be a Democrat. But then again, Barack Obama used to be a Democrat too.” – Jay Leno

“You could smell Rick Perry’s cologne through the TV.” – David Letterman

“Rick Perry and Mitt Romney squared off at the Republican debate. The only thing they agreed on was ‘shampoo, rinse, and repeat’.” – Jay Leno

“Don’t they look like two guys waiting to audition for the same part in a soap opera?” – Jay Leno

“Rick Perry also defended his claim that Social Security is nothing but a Ponzi scheme. Michele Bachmann jumped on that. She told them flat out, “Hey, it has to be either a Fonzi scheme or a Potsie scheme. There was no Ponzi…” – Jay Leno

“Michele Bachmann said that she can get us back to two dollar gas. Please! The only place you can get two dollar gas is at Taco Bell.” – Jay Leno

“Actually, history was made at the Reagan Library last night. I believe it was the first time Michele Bachmann has ever been in a library.” – Jay Leno

“You know what is really cool about the Reagan Library? They have Air Force One – Reagan’s actual Air Force One – parked right inside the building. You get the feeling that’s about as close to Air Force One as any of those candidates are ever going to get.” – Jay Leno

“Ultraconservative Rick Santorum said he is the son of an Italian immigrant. Immediately after the comment, Santorum had his dad deported.” – Conan O’Brien

“I tried to TiVo the debate and my TiVo fell asleep.” – David Letterman

“Tonight was President Obama’s jobs speech and the NFL season opener. Which explains why Biden got confused and dumped Gatorade on President Obama.” – Jimmy Fallon

“I don’t get why everyone is hung up about getting jobs. Isn’t it better to stay up until 4:00 in the morning watching reruns of ‘Sanford and Son?'” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Tomorrow is Bring Your Son or Daughter to the Unemployment Office Day.” – David Letterman

“Earlier this evening President Obama gave his big jobs speech. So what we had tonight was a guy whose job nobody approves of, giving a speech about jobs that don’t exist, to people who don’t have any jobs. So it’s a real positive, uplifting…” – Jay Leno

“President Obama’s $447-billion spending plan is called the American Jobs Act. It would have had a cooler name, but the name guy was laid off six months ago.” – Jimmy Fallon

“The president said we need more products stamped ‘Made in America.’ OK, let’s get the Chinese to get a stamp that says ‘Made in America.'” – Jimmy Kimmel

“President Obama plans to create thousands of new jobs by replacing all automobile GPS systems with real people who sit in the back seat with a map.” – Jimmy Kimmel

“Republicans actually decided not to give a rebuttal to President Obama’s jobs speech tonight. I guess they figured there’s already a rebuttal to his jobs speech: No jobs.” – Jimmy Fallon

“According to the latest L.A. Times poll, 75% of Californians believe the country is headed in the wrong direction. And 60% of Californians are so disillusioned, they’re thinking about moving back to Mexico.” – Jay Leno

“The Libyan rebels say they have Khadafy trapped within a 40-mile radius. Or as that’s also called, not trapped.” – Jimmy Fallon

Share

The War on the Postal Service

We’ve all seen reports of the impending bankruptcy of the US Postal Service (USPS). How they need to stop Saturday home delivery, close post offices, and lay off 120,000 employees (18% of their workforce).

But what you haven’t heard is why this is happening. Well, you will hear that it is the fault of the Internet, that people are sending email rather than sending letters. But that is utter bullshit.

In fact, the three busiest years for the USPS, when the volume of mail was the highest in its history, were 2005, 2006, and 2007. What caused the volume of mail to drop after that was not the Internet, but the economy going south starting in 2008, brought on by the popping of Wall Street’s derivatives bubble. And over the last decade, the USPS has already shed 100,000 employees from attrition, so they should be able to deal with a reduction in the volume of mail.

Furthermore, the prices that the USPS can charge for mail are mandated by Congress, and since Congress doesn’t want them to compete against private companies like UPS and Fedex, what they are allowed to charge for packages is kept high while rates for first class mail (on which the USPS has a monopoly) are kept low. Rates for “bulk rate” junk mail are even lower. Reducing the amount of bulk rate mail actually saves the USPS money.

And the number of packages being mailed has been going up, due to people shopping on the Internet. At least until Amazon figures out a way to email that T-shirt you just ordered.

An statement in US News and World Report gives a clue to the real problem at the USPS:

Cash flow is so tight that unless Congress steps in, the postal service won’t be able to make a big payment due to its retiree healthcare plan at the end of September. That would be the equivalent of a default on its obligations.

The real culprit is the insane USPS retiree healthcare and pension plans! In 2006, Congress passed the Postal Accountability Enhancement Act (PAEA), which requires the USPS to fully fund retiree health care benefits 75 years in advance. They have to pay for health care benefits for future retirees who have not even been born yet.

No other government service, agency, corporation, or organization in the US has to do this, only the USPS. Every other entity uses a pay-as-you-go accounting practice. Instead the USPS has to cough up $5.5 billion every year and give it to the US Treasury to fund retirement packages in the distant future.

At the same time, the USPS has been required to overpay worker pension funds by an estimated $57 billion to $82 billion. If that money were available to fund other obligations through a return to normal accounting practices, the currently projected USPS deficit of $9 billion for 2011 would vanish.

So why is Congress trying to kill the USPS? Well, we’ve seen in Wisconsin what conservative politicians will do to kill public employee unions, and the postal union is one of the largest in the country. And as much as they would like to privatize the USPS they can’t because it is part of the constitution. So it is easier to destroy it.

Furthermore, the cuts they are proposing to the USPS will disproportionately hurt — you guessed it — the poor. Not just the rural poor, who depend on the USPS to deliver mail in remote areas private companies like UPS and Fedex won’t serve because they are not profitable enough, but also urban poor. It is no coincidence that of the 34 post offices the USPS is considering closing in New York City, 17 of them are inside the poorest Congressional district in America.

Share