© Tom Toles With free shipping and next day delivery, and complete secrecy guaranteed by the Supreme Court! Our favorite data-driven prognosticator of elections, Nate Silver, is predicting that the Republicans have a 62% chance of winning a majority in the Senate, while the Democrats have a 38% chance of keeping the majority. That’s a […]
“Secret Service Director Julia Pierson stepped down after two major security breaches at the White House. It turns out Pierson’s first job was actually as a costumed character at Disney World. I’m guessing the character was Sleeping Beauty.” – Jimmy Fallon “Julia Pierson hopped over the fence and turned in her resignation.” – David Letterman […]
Some Fear Ebola Outbreak Could Make Nation Turn to Science by Andy Borowitz NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—There is a deep-seated fear among some Americans that an Ebola outbreak could make the country turn to science. In interviews conducted across the nation, leading anti-science activists expressed their concern that the American people, wracked with anxiety […]
“After all the recent security breaches at the White House, Julia Pierson, the director of the Secret Service, resigned today. She said she’ll miss being in the White House, but knowing the Secret Service, she should be able to come back any time she wants. The door is always open … literally.” – Jimmy Fallon […]
The casualties are the Fourth and Fifth Amendments to our Constitution. The 4th says “The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects,[a] against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated.” The 5th says “… nor shall any person … be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without […]
“Congratulations to Chelsea Clinton, who gave birth to a baby girl named Charlotte on Friday. Or as Hillary described the baby, ‘Third in line to the throne’.” – Jimmy Fallon “Congratulations to Chelsea Clinton. Over the weekend, she gave birth to a baby girl. The baby girl will not confirm or deny whether she’s running […]
© Anna Redi And don’t tell me that we should just stop all flights from Africa to the US. That would make things worse (as pointed out by Jon Stewart and others). Besides, it wouldn’t stop anyone who really wanted to fly to the US, because they could just fly somewhere else, then fly to […]
“The Department of Defense unveiled a new policy that will let undocumented immigrants serve in the military. Is it me, or does that just sound like a sneaky way to get rid of immigrants?” – Jimmy Fallon “Attorney General Eric Holder announced today that he is resigning after five years with the administration. Obama said, […]
Maurice Greenberg, the former CEO (and major shareholder) of AIG, the insurance giant that was on the brink of bankruptcy before being bailed out by the government in 2008, is suing the government, demanding billions of dollars in compensation. Why? Greenberg claims that “the government ripped him and other stockholders off by failing to negotiate […]
Once again, it is a comedy show that gives us the most reliable news. Meanwhile, the regular media is continuing to spread fear and stupidity:
Fascinating interview with Matt Bai, who accuses his own profession of making politics just that much worse. Watch it:
“President Obama is facing criticism over an incident yesterday where he was holding a cup of coffee in his hand, and then used that same hand to salute a Marine. Though with all that’s going on in the world, I’m surprised he didn’t salute with a bottle of Jack Daniels in one hand and a […]
“Old World” diseases had a devastating effect on the native inhabitants of the new world. There were no accurate counts at the time, but it is estimated that between 80 and 95% of native americans died from Smallpox alone. In absolute terms, this was more deaths than caused by all wars and even the Black […]
© Tom Tomorrow I suppose social media, like all public opinion, is important. After all, it was largely public opinion that ended the Vietnam War. But unfortunately, social media can be used for evil as well.
“The White House has been having big security issues lately, after an intruder actually managed to jump the fence and make it inside. The White House actually said they will start locking the doors. When asked if he wanted a key, Biden said, ‘I’m fine just using the doggie door’.” – Jimmy Fallon “It’s bad […]
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