[by Andy Borowitz. Reprinted from The Borowitz Report.] Bachmann Claims White House Has Links to Extremist Group Called Democrats WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) — Representative Michele Bachmann (R., Minn.) stirred controversy today by claiming that several key members of the Obama Administration had links to a shadowy extremist group called the Democratic Party. While Representative […]
Stephen Colbert brilliantly notices that there is a better alternative to Republican party candidate Mitt Romney, at least in one state: Transcript: You know, after two years and billions of dollars, our presidential election is going to come down to a few undecided voters in key swing states. The fate of our country is now […]
“In 2012 I realized the company I was CEO of in 1999 did things that would hurt my presidential run in the present, so I retroactively wasn’t there.” – Jon Stewart (mocking Mitt Romney’s “retroactive retirement” from Bain Capital) “I was just the guy with the smoke screenish, yet still legal title of CEO and […]
“Have you heard this? They’re saying Condoleezza Rice is on the top of the vice presidential list for Mitt Romney. Many Republicans think they compliment each other: Romney has experience with American jobs, Condi has experience with foreign countries, and since all American jobs are in foreign countries, they would be the perfect team.” – […]
Jon Stewart on Romney’s excuses for not releasing his tax returns. Brilliant! © Jim Benton
“Mitt Romney is worth $250 million, and reporters said, “Mitt, honestly, how did you get so rich?’ And he said, ‘Well, I’ve always been good with my money and I do smart things. I always make sure my tires are properly inflated. And I save 15 percent on my car insurance by switching to Geico.’” […]
Warning: Not safe for work. Or for Republicans. Sarah Silverman has an indecent proposal for casino magnate Sheldon Adelson. That’s right, the man who has pledged at least $100 million to defeat Obama (John McCain claims that it is foreign money). For more information, see http://scissorsheldon.com/ UPDATE: Also, you might be wondering why Sheldon Adelson […]
© Kevin Siers It seems to be a common GOP tactic, to accuse your opponent of things of which you yourself are guilty. But in this case, I’m not sure that strategy will work. Romney is already too much like Obama for conservatives. © Tom Tomorrow
Greenpeace, the Yes Lab, and members of the Occupy movement are trolling Shell Oil, creating fake websites that look like they are from Shell, throwing lavish parties, and issuing press releases in Shell’s name. The best part is this fake social networking site, that invites people to create ads about “Arctic Energy”. The “Yes Lab” […]
“Mitt Romney gave a speech at the annual NAACP conference in Houston. Why, I don’t know. Maybe he confused NAACP with NASCAR.” – Jimmy Kimmel “The event got off to a bad start when Romney pulled up in front of the convention center and he instinctively locked the doors to his limo.” – Jimmy Kimmel […]
“There’s now a big controversy after a liberal group made a video saying Mitt Romney is too white for black people. Too white for black people? Mitt is too white for white people.” – Jay Leno “In a new interview, Mitt Romney said he doesn’t know where his financial records are because he doesn’t manage […]
“The latest poll shows 56% of voters think President Obama has changed America – for the worse. At this point, there’s only one thing that can keep Mitt Romney from beating him. Mitt Romney. ” – Jay Leno “Mitt Romney’s campaign raised $35 million more than President Obama for the month of June. Out of […]
© Jerry Holbert Everybody knows that taxes are things that only Democrats do! If a Republican does it, then it must be a penalty.
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