It looks like the Republican nominating process is even more of a mess than we already knew it was. In fact, there is a chance that it isn’t actually over yet.
For example, first Romney was declared the winner in Iowa, then Santorum, and now it looks like Ron Paul actually won.
In 1920, Warren G. Harding had the fewest delegates of any candidate going into the Republican National Convention, but ten ballots later he was nominated and went on to win the presidency in a 60% to 34% landslide. Could Ron Paul do the same thing?
Once upon a time, the word “conservative” came from the same root as “conservation”. But today, the only thing conservatives are trying to conserve is their bank accounts.
For thirty years prior to 2000, earthquakes in the central US averaged 21 a year. But after oil and gas drilling operations started using “fracking“, where water, sand, and chemicals are injected into deep shale formations, earthquakes jumped to 50 in 2009, 87 in 2010, and 134 in 2011. There is also concern that fracking taints drinking water.
And doubly ironically, Limbaugh calling Fluke a “prostitute” and a “slut” were a blatant attempt to attack people who spoke out on women’s issues. But back in 2007, a contractor sued two Angie’s List members for libel after he received a negative review on the site, in a similar attempt to keep people from speaking out.
“That Secret Service sex scandal keeps growing. Here’s the latest: Three of the Secret Service agents involved in the sex and cocaine scandal are now leaving the agency. On the bright side, they’re going to have one hell of a going-away party.” – Conan O’Brien
“Reporters are in Colombia digging up anything on the Secret Service prostitution scandal. There was a dispute in the hotel. The escort said they made an agreement the night before to pay her $800, which is a lot for an escort. For that, you could get a Ford Escort.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“After they promised $800, they only gave her $30. That’s what you call a trade deficit.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“The escort claims the agents said they did not remember agreeing to pay $800 because they were drunk the night before and she refused to leave the room until she got paid. Eventually they settled for $225. These are the guys we should put in charge of negotiating our foreign debt.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“Eleven Secret Service agents are being investigated. So far one has been fired, one resigned, one retired, and the rest are thinking about leaving just because the party is over.” – Jimmy Kimmel
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In an interview Sunday night, former presidential candidate Jon Huntsman had some things to say about the current state of the Republican Party.
At his first presidential debate, he was struck by the question “Is this the best we could do?”
Apparently it was, since any deviation from party dogma was swiftly punished. When he said he believed in science, people “look at you quizzically as though you’re an oddball”.
He also mildly compared the GOP to the Chinese Communist Party. After he said some things the party didn’t like, he was disinvited from a Florida fundraiser in March. “That is what they do in China on party matters if you talk off script.”
He jokingly blamed his failed candidacy in part on his wife telling him that she would leave him if he abandoned his principles. “She said if you pandered, if you sign any of those damn pledges, I’ll leave you.”
Finally, he commented that Ronald Reagan would “likely not” be able to win the Republican nomination today, given the current political climate.
Conservative talk show hosts Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity, and Michael Savage all work for Premier Networks.
Premier Networks is owned by Clear Channel Communications, which is the largest owner and operator of radio stations, and also owns various other media outlets, including billboards.
In 2008, Clear Channel was bought by Bain Capital in a leveraged buyout. Bain Capital has acquired hundreds of companies, including other media companies.
Mitt Romney is the co-founder of Bain Capital and still owns a significant portion of it. He also served as its CEO, although on paper he is no longer involved in management decisions.
The obsession with trying people in the media is truly evil. It rarely leads to true justice, ruins lives, cost millions if not billions of dollars, and distracts us from real issues and problems.
And why do certain cases trigger a sustained media obsession, while thousands of equally compelling cases go completely ignored? There are answers for some of the cases — for example, O.J. Simpson was already a celebrity before his trial. But there must be hundreds of medical stories like that of Terry Schiavo, and hundreds of people like Trayvon Martin killed, every single day, who get nary a peep in the media.
I started pondering this when we all got swept up in the spectacle of Hilary Rosen denigrating Ann Romney for not working (though rather than being deeply offended, the candidate’s wife proclaimed this an “early birthday present.”)
That, in turn, followed our collective enthrallment over Romney aide Eric Fehrnstrom describing their Etch a Sketch operation, which in turn followed the uproar over Rush Limbaugh calling a law student a slut, which followed…well, it’s hard to remember at this point.
Each of these episodes, considered separately, contains elements of substance that were soon overwhelmed by the rhetoric emanating from the media echo chamber. Collectively, they suggest that what should be a serious campaign in hard economic times has turned into a spectacle in which we are amusing ourselves to death.
“President Obama is gearing up for his presidential campaign. He’s creating a new series of ads. The first ad boasts “just last week my Secret Service created jobs for 11 Colombian women.” – Conan O’Brien
“The Secret Service prostitution scandal has gotten worse because apparently agents were also snorting cocaine. However, in the agents’ defense, the Colombian hotels offer cocaine in the mini bar.” – Conan O’Brien
“President Obama, in his memoir, talked about his childhood in Indonesia living with his stepfather. He said when he was 8 years old, his stepfather introduced him to a number of unusual meats, including dog. Our president ate dog. Not only that, according to the book, he also ate snake. And his mother was looking for tiger. He was eating through Noah’s Ark.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“But the dog thing — maybe that is where the floppy ears come from.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“This is not something that someone dug up on him. This was in a book the president wrote himself. How did we miss this? If Ryan Seacrest wrote a book and said he ate dog, we would know about it.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“Conservatives are now criticizing President Obama because as a child in Indonesia he sometimes ate dog meat. But on the plus side, Obama is now polling very well among cats.” – Conan O’Brien
“Between Romney and Obama, it is a frightening time to be a dog in this country. But the best time ever to be a cat.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“Google, I am shocked. You stole people’s personal information without their permission? That is Facebook’s job!” – Jon Stewart
“The deadline to file your tax returns was last night at midnight. If you forget, don’t worry. The IRS never checks.” – Jimmy Kimmel
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There are just a couple of problems. First of all, the plant was closed four years ago, before Obama was elected. And second, when Obama was sworn in, unemployment in Ohio stood at 8.6%. It peaked at 10.6% during the second half of 2009, but it now dropped to 7.6% as of February.
“This year the government will spend a trillion dollars more than it will take in. Experts say 32 percent of our taxes go to defense. And the rest buys hookers for the Secret Service.” – Craig Ferguson
“In case you’re wondering where your tax dollars go, 21 percent goes to Medicare and Medicaid, 20 percent to social security, 20 percent to defense spending, and the other 39 percent they squander.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“I don’t mind paying taxes. But what I don’t get: When we send in our return, why do we have to put stamps on the envelope? Can’t they give us a pass on that?” – Jimmy Kimmel
“There is a record number of Americans now who owe so much in back taxes that they are renouncing their U.S. citizenship. These Americans were offered a place in Nicholas Cage-istan.” – Conan O’Brien
“The IRS is very into social media now. They have five different Twitter accounts. And while you may not be following them, they are definitely following you.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“The IRS also has four Facebook pages and zero friends on all of those.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“According to his tax return, President Obama made $800,000 last year. In fact, the president made so much money that today he endorsed Mitt Romney for president.” – Craig Ferguson
“Ann Romney…is defending her husband for once strapping the family dog to the roof of their station wagon on a family trip, saying, ‘The dog loved it.’ Unfortunately the dog could not be reached for comment because he ran away to stay with Michael Vick.” – Conan O’Brien
“During a campaign event, Newt Gingrich was bitten by a penguin. It was feeding time and Newt and the penguin were fighting over pieces of squid.” – Conan O’Brien
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Yes, the Supreme Court really did rule that it was ok for jails to use routine strip searches, even for people arrested for minor traffic violations. Why should we be afraid of body cavity searches if we have nothing to hide?
“Did you hear how they caught those Secret Service agents with prostitutes in Colombia? Apparently the men were walking around wearing nothing but their sunglasses and those earpieces.” – Conan O’Brien
“President Obama talked about the Secret Service prostitution scandal, saying he’s reserving judgment until all the facts are in, or at least until he figures out a way to blame this on Mitt Romney.” – Craig Ferguson
“Mitt Romney has already begun the process of choosing a running mate. Romney wants someone with a different ethnicity who appeals to women, so his first choice is President Obama.” – Conan O’Brien
“The Democrats accuse the Republicans of launching a war on women. Then the Republicans accuse the Democrats of the same thing. At this point, who can remember who enacted reproductive health restrictions in 36 states including mandatory transvaginal ultrasounds?” – Stephen Colbert
“At the St. Louis Zoo, Newt Gingrich got too close to one of the animals and was bit on the hand by a penguin. If you’re named after a lizard, you have to assume birds are going to try to eat you.” – Jimmy Kimmel
“A British historical society declared that Britain’s greatest foe of all time was George Washington, our George Washington. Coming in second place was Adolf Hitler and third place went to Madonna’s accent.” – Conan O’Brien
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It’s going to be the dirtiest campaign you’ve ever seen. I would say: Hide the children and check the plumbing because you’re going to have to shower several times a day.
