“But it’s not all bad news for the former San Diego mayor. Today Bob Filner was offered a new job as a TSA agent at the airport. So, you fly often, do you?” – Jay Leno “Eighteen women are accusing Bob Filner of sexual assault. He even groped a great grandmother. Isn’t that awful? Even […]
Religious people often like to claim that without religion, people would abandon their morals and the world would descend into chaos. Or something like that. Of course, they don’t have to offer any proof of that because, well, they are religious, so they just take it on faith. But now we are finally hearing from […]
“So former President George W. Bush had to go into the hospital, had a little heart surgery and he’s OK, but he blames it all on the fatty foods served by White House butler Forest Whitaker.” – David Letterman “Doctors told him to avoid any heavy exertion, so that means no reading. He had a […]
“Mayor Filner of San Diego has had 14 women come forward alleging that he sexually harassed them. In San Diego, Hooters restaurants are refusing to serve Filner because they say he’s disrespectful to women in his office. The CEO said there’s a time and a place to be disrespect to women and that’s at a […]
© Lalo Alcaraz Does it mean that the 99% end up on the ground? I think this comic hit me mainly because of how terrorism laws are now being used to harass anyone the government doesn’t like, including journalists. Why wouldn’t we worry about laws that allow you to shoot someone if you feel threatened? […]
“Some unelected, activist judge has rejected Stop and Frisk on the bizarre theory that minorities have the constitutional right not to be stopped at random and manhandled by strangers. Despite the fact that when the Constitution was written, minorities weren’t even invented yet.” – Stephen Colbert “Sixty-two percent of New Yorkers say they are embarrassed […]
“The new iPhone is coming soon. The new iPhone is going to have a new feature that actually keeps track of your every movement. Then President Obama was like, ‘Right. NEW feature’.” – Jimmy Fallon “Yesterday, President Obama met with the Greek prime minister to discuss reforming Greece’s economy. President Obama talked with the prime […]
“A man in Colorado wants marijuana to be classified as a vegetable. I just have to say that that’s an ingenious way to get Americans to stop smoking pot.” – Conan O’Brien “The New York City Department of Education says that only 26 percent of the city’s students passed the English portion on a recent […]
“During a fundraiser last night, Mitt Romney told Republicans that they need to pick a candidate for 2016 who can actually win. And Republicans said, ‘Yeah, I wish you told us that last year. But hey, thanks a lot.’” – Jimmy Fallon “The Republican National Committee now says if NBC and CNN don’t pull plans […]
“Welcome to a very special edition of ‘The Tonight Show.’ The White House announced that in the coming days, President Obama will be reaching out to Americans who have lost their jobs. In fact, that’s why he’s here with me tonight. He’s talking to me personally.” – Jay Leno “As our studio audience knows, the […]
“Happy birthday to President Obama! He will be 52 years old on Sunday. I bet he can’t wait for Michelle to wheel out that tofu cake with the broccoli icing.” – Jay Leno “If you’d like to get the president a gift, you can’t go wrong with Edward Snowden. He would love that.” – Jay […]
“At a concert this week, Justin Bieber rubbed a fan’s smartphone on his crotch. In a related story, Justin Bieber is now in 3rd place in the New York city mayoral race.” – Conan O’Brien “The latest scandal for Weiner is that his communications director called a former intern a ‘slut bag’. But Weiner says […]
“The Anthony Weiner campaign’s communications director is in trouble for calling a former intern an inappropriate name. But Weiner said he’d take care of it. He promised to give them both a good texting to.” – Jimmy Fallon “A new poll came out and says that most Democrats think Anthony Weiner has basically lost his […]
Abortion Bush Campaign Finance Cheney Climate Clinton Congress Conservatives Corporations Corruption Deficits Democrats Drugs Economy Education Election Elections Energy Environment Fox News Gays Guns Health Immigration Lies McCain Media Middle East Obama Palin Protests Racism Religion Republicans Romney Spying Supreme Court Taxes Tea Party Terrorism Terrorists Torture Trump Unemployment War
