Skip to content

A Climate for Evolution?

I’ve been concerned about all the money being donated by the Koch brothers to prestigious museums to influence their exhibits, but now we know what Science on Koch looks like. A reader [thanks Jay!] sent me this photo they took at the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History:

Climate Change on Koch

So climate change was a good thing that helped us evolve into modern humans? I just hope that the current round of climate change (and resulting mass extinction), which we are unleashing on ourselves, makes way for a smarter species that doesn’t shit all over its own home.

Share

Late Night Political Humor

“According to a new survey, Lord Voldemort from ‘Harry Potter’ actually has a higher favorability rating than most GOP presidential candidates. Or in other words, ‘He who must not be named’ is more popular than ‘He whose name I forgot’ and ‘What’s her face’.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Republican candidate Carly Fiorina said that if she becomes president she wants people to be able to take out their phones and vote on ideas during her speeches. Which worked out well for people who already had their phones out during Carly Fiorina’s speeches.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Presidential hopeful Rand Paul warned the media today that if anyone is mean to his wife during the campaign, they’ll have to answer to him. And Hillary Clinton said that if anyone is mean to Bill, that’s totally fine.” – Seth Meyers

“Olympic figure skater Michelle Kwan is now a full-time paid staffer on Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign. While Tonya Harding was hired to take care of any other Democrats who enter the race.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Vladimir Putin traveled to Italy to meet with Pope Francis yesterday. They say Putin should be done with confession by sometime next fall.” – Jimmy Fallon

Share

It’s Alive!

Obamacare survives its second court challenge, and it wasn’t even close. By 6-3, the Supreme Court sided with Obama that federal subsidies are legal. Although Republicans spoke angrily about the decision, they would have been in quite a pickle if the case against the ACA had won. Millions of Americans would have lost their health insurance subsidies, and they would have blamed the Republicans for it.

Share

Flag this Error

Ann Coulter proved in just one sentence that she is not just hateful, but ignorant. Appearing on Fox Business Network, Coulter talked about efforts to take down the Confederate flag from the South Carolina state capitol, efforts that are supported by the South Carolina governor, Nikki Haley.

I’m appalled by––though, I really like to like Nikki Haley since she is a Republican. On the other hand, she is an immigrant and does not understand America’s history.

Three interesting points. First, Coulter decides who to like based on their political party? Second, immigrants can’t understand history? And third, Nikki Haley was born in South Carolina. She is not an immigrant (although her parents are).

Added bonus factoids: Apparently Confederate flag sales at Amazon are up 2,305%. The Confederate flag is now outselling the US flag (just before the 4th of July!). Amazon has announced that they are pulling all Confederate merchandise, as are Walmart and Sears.

Share

Trumps Me!

Matt Lubchansky
© Matt Lubchansky

What an amazing political system we have. Rich people competing to be elected. Other rich people giving money to them to run for office. Rich pundit people on TV telling us who to vote for and judging how “serious” the candidates are by how much money they can raise from other rich people.

It’s rich, I tell ya!

Share

Late Night Political Humor

“What a game last night. The Cleveland Cavaliers beat the Golden State Warriors to take a 2-1 lead in the NBA Finals. The next time you’ll see someone fighting this hard for Ohio won’t be until next year’s presidential election.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Jeb Bush is taking his presidential campaign on a tour of Europe. He’s telling Europeans, ‘I like you guys because you’re comfortable having the same family in charge for centuries.'” – Conan O”Brien

“Hillary Clinton has joined Instagram. Meanwhile, her Democratic opponent Bernie Sanders joined telegram.” – Seth Meyers

“Hillary Clinton joined Instagram this afternoon and somehow she’s already deleted thousands of photos.” – Seth Meyers

Share

Catholic in Name Only

Republicans successfully purged moderates from their party by saying that they were RINO — Republicans in Name Only. But now we are seeing something truly amazing — conservatives who profess to be Catholics attacking Pope Francis and calling him names, because he issued a papal encyclical on climate change that calls on us to reject rampant greed and treat our God-given planet with more respect. How dare he!

My favorite, although almost incomprehensible, comes from professional political candidate Alan Keyes, who while claiming to be a Catholic, attacks the the Pope, saying that he looks more like Marx, Stalin, or Mao Zedong, and claims that Francis is exploiting the issue of man-made climate change as “an excuse to advance a totalitarian agenda for the use or abuse of government power throughout the world.” Keyes goes on to repeat the misinformation about climate change that “the facts have not been thus established. In fact much that has come to light supports the view that scientific data were purposely skewed to support a conclusion contrary to fact.” The best part (hold on tight) is “But if the climate change allegations against humanity are unproven, the whole push for totalitarian government remediation of the allegedly terrible damage we are inflicting on God’s creation is a slander against the human race, a sin against humanity being committed as a pretext for the rape of human life, human conscience and God-endowed human liberty.” Wow.

The right-wing noise machine was even worse. Rush Limbaugh says that the encyclical “seems to confirm” that Pope Francis is a “Marxist”. He also called the encyclical “The Pope’s Leaked Marxist Climate Rant”.

Michael Savage was even blunter, saying “The Pope is a Marxist. I stand by those words. He is a wolf in pope’s clothing, he is an eco-wolf in pope’s clothing. He is a stealth Marxist in religious garb.” He also said “He sounds like the false prophet in revelation … directing mankind to worship the Antichrist.”

Fox Business News warned that Pope Francis and President Obama are forming “a policy alliance” and are “a powerful force, a very powerful force, pushing left.” He then asked: “Will Francis and Barack reshape the world by taxing the rich, taxing fossil fuels, and redistributing the wealth? That’s exactly what they are trying to do.”

Have any of these people calling the Pope a Marxist read anything in the Bible about Jesus Christ?

And of course, Republican presidential candidates are getting into the act. Jeb Bush, who also claims to be Catholic, suggested that the Pope should butt out of political issues. Rick Santorum, a self-professed devout Catholic, slammed Pope Francis for getting “involved with controversial political and scientific theories.” (Santorum, of course, doesn’t mind making religious issues like gay rights into political issues).

The “religious right” has shown their true colors. They worship only money and greed.

Share

Late Night Political Humor

“During a recent speech, Mike Huckabee said he is the only person who has fought the Clinton political machine and won. ‘You sure about that?’ said President Barack Obama.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Mike Huckabee said he’s the only person who has fought the Clinton political machine and won. As opposed to Democratic candidate Bernie Sanders, who’s the only person who fought a fax machine and lost.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Yesterday in Iowa just four supporters showed up to eat lunch with Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum. It’s always a bad sign when your entire voter base can fit in a deli booth.” – Conan O’Brien

“Presidential hopeful Lindsey Graham, who is single, said today that if elected he will have a ‘rotating first lady.’ Even creepier, he said it on Tinder.” – Seth Meyers

“Donald Trump said over the weekend that his decision whether to run for president is going to make a lot of people very happy. That’s too bad. I was hoping he would run.” – Seth Meyers

“In a recent interview, Vladimir Putin said that despite any conflicts the West has no need to be afraid of Russia. Although keep in mind that Putin said that as he was petting a tank.” – Jimmy Fallon

Share

Fact Checking Satire?

Here’s a new one for me. PolitiFact Texas has done a fact check on some satire by Andy Borowitz. Quotes from Borowitz have appeared in this blog, but he normally writes satire in a humor column for the The New Yorker.

Borowitz recently posted on Facebook “Texas is now our most pro-life state, with just seven abortion clinics and a little over ninety thousand gun stores.”

So PolitiFact decided to fact check his numbers. They found that instead of seven abortion clinics, Texas actually has 22 clinics that are licensed to provide abortions (it is unclear whether all of them actually provide abortions). Ironically, those clinics are concentrated in just seven large cities in Texas (Houston, Dallas, San Antonio, Austin, El Paso, Fort Worth, and McAllen), which does mean that only people in those seven locations have local access to legal abortions. So in a way, Borowitz’s exaggeration (perhaps accidentally) is more relevant than he expected.

As for gun shops, Texas has 10,847 licensed gun dealers, although likely only around 6,000 of them are brick-and-mortar gun stores (gun dealers also sell at gun shows and online). So Borowitz was off by an order of magnitude. I have to wonder if those gun shops are concentrated in those same seven cities.

Bottom line? Even PolitiFact admits “Remember, though, he’s a comedian.” And the New Yorker points out that the figures “aren’t factual”. Still, with almost 500 times more gun dealers than abortion providers, I’d say his satire is dead on.

Share

Terrorist Propaganda

Glenn Greenwald makes a strong argument that the word “Terrorism” has become a meaningless propaganda term in the West. Or maybe not meaningless, but the meaning has sunk to “any heinous act of violence perpetrated by a Muslim or other minority, usually against white westerners”.

How else do you explain how hardly anyone is describing the shooting in South Carolina as terrorism, even though the goal of this hate crime was to terrorize blacks. Indeed, early news reports even declared that there was “no sign of terrorism”. Would they have said the same thing if the shooter was Muslim?

Greenwald points out how the term has lost all meaning, allowing it to be used for pure propaganda:

The examples proving the utter malleability of the term “terrorism” are far too numerous to chronicle here. But over the past decade alone, it’s been used by Western political and media figures to condemn Muslims who used violence against an invading and occupying force in Afghanistan, against others who raised funds to help Iraqis fight against an invading and occupying military in their country, and for others who attack soldiers in an army that is fighting many wars. In other words, any violence by Muslims against the West is inherently “terrorism,” even if targeted only at soldiers at war and/or designed to resist invasion and occupation.

By stark contrast, no violence by the West against Muslims can possibly be “terrorism,” no matter how brutal, inhumane or indiscriminately civilian-killing. The U.S. can call its invasion of Baghdad “Shock and Awe” as a classic declaration of terrorism intent, or fly killer drones permanently over terrorized villages and cities, or engage in generation-lasting atrocities in Fallujah, or arm and fund Israeli and Saudi destruction of helpless civilian populations, and none of that, of course, can possibly be called “terrorism.” It just has the wrong perpetrators and the wrong victims.

And this is not a new phenomenon. Even before 9/11, our government branded Nelson Mandela as a terrorist. Iraq was on the terrorist list, then off it, according to our whims. Reagan armed and funded terrorist groups in Latin America, while hypocritically condemning Russia and Iran for being state sponsors of terrorism.

Share

Not Just a River in Egypt

Tom Tomorrow
© Tom Tomorrow

I believe that the second amendment does give people the right to own guns. It just seems to me that there should be some way to close all the stupid loopholes that allow people to buy guns with no background check. I’d even be in favor of requiring people to pass some kind of safety test before buying a gun, like we do for driver’s licenses.

Why some people think the second amendment is absolute and will allow no restrictions just seems insane. The right to free speech does not allow someone to yell “Fire!” in a crowded theatre. Nor does the right to practice your religion allow you to sacrifice humans to your chosen deity.

But some kind of compromise over gun laws is unlikely, when you have people like NRA executive Charles Cotton. Cotton suggested online that one of the slain people, pastor and Democratic state Senator Clementa Pinckney, was partly to blame because he had voted against legislation that would have allowed concealed handguns to be carried in churches. Cotton wrote “Eight of his church members who might be alive if he had expressly allowed members to carry handguns in church are dead.”

Share

Suicide Waiting Lists?

[This is one of those stories that may be just too ironic to be true. Unfortunately, just seeing it in multiple reputable news sources isn’t good enough anymore. And yet I haven’t found anything to discredit it. But as Colbert might say, it does have a certain truthiness to it, so I’m posting it anyway.]

Corruption for Martyrs?

Pro-Islamic-State (IS, also known as ISIS or ISIL) religious leader Kamil Abu Sultan is complaining about corruption and nepotism in the extremist organization. Why? Because Saudi militants inside IS are giving preferential treatment to their friends for suicide-bombing missions in Iraq and Syria. According to an article in Radio Free Europe:

According to Abu Sultan, the waiting list for suicide bombers in Syria is so long that — ironically — some militants die on the battlefield before they get their chance to explode for IS.

One would-be suicide bomber complained that the only way to get a suicide-bombing assignment in Iraq is through what is known as “blat” — a Russian slang term meaning connections.

An interview on the BBC a year ago revealed the existence of waiting lists for would-be suicide bombers.

Apparently, suicide missions carry more prestige than being killed in battle, because “A militant who carries out a suicide truck bombing will have a far greater and more spectacular impact than a foot soldier who is killed on the battlefield.”

An article published in Australia says that foreign fighters, especially those from western countries are prized by IS and also given priority.

Share

Charleston South Carolina Shooting

Jon Stewart points out the utter hypocrisy our response to Islamic terrorism compared to our own ongoing racial terrorism:

Some people have suggested that Jon Stewart run for political office. Maybe even president. And I don’t mean like Stephen Colbert ran for president. This video is evidence that Stewart could easily make the transition from comedian to serious political candidate. We could do far worse (and we have).

Share

Late Night Political Humor

“Lincoln Chafee, former governor of Rhode Island, announced he’s running for president. Before he announced he’s running, his wife went on Facebook and asked his staff if they remembered his password. Because if a Facebook password is too hard to remember, the launch codes for the nukes should be a piece of cake.” – Jimmy Fallon

“Over the weekend, Hillary Clinton supported raising the federal minimum wage to $15 per hour. She said every American should be able to afford to attend one of her speeches.” – Conan O’Brien

“In an interview yesterday, Lindsey Graham discussed his foreign policy and said if people are worn out by war, quote, ‘Don’t vote for me.’ Graham’s supporters appreciate his honesty, while his opponents appreciate the sound bite they can use in their attack ads.” – Jimmy Fallon

“At a summit this weekend, President Obama accidentally missed a high five from the prime minister of Iraq. Pretty embarrassing, but not as bad as the time George W. Bush left Saddam hanging.” – Seth Meyers

“The biggest blockbuster of the summer is coming out, and it stars Barack Obama. It’s a Disney picture called ‘Honey, I Shrunk the Economy.'” – Seth Meyers

“We have a historic drought going on now in this state. Due to the drought, California Governor Jerry Brown said he has cut back on bathing. As a result, Californians have cut back on hanging out with Jerry Brown.” – Conan O’Brien

“A federal court has ruled that the U.S. Postal Service must reduce its stamp prices. The change in stamp prices is expected to affect as many as seven Americans.” – Conan O’Brien

Share

John Oliver Explains Patent Trolls

I’ve talked about patents many times in this blog, but this hilarious video from Last Week Tonight will remind you that Congress is starting to reconsider patent reform again. I hope they do something about it this time. Patent trolls are already costing us trillions of dollars and putting a huge damper on our economy.

Share